Attend a self-help or motivational seminar.

“The facilitator (who happened to be a former church minister), took the stage with all the enthusiasm of a motivational speaker (or preacher). And after some icebreakers, he started getting into some very real teachings. People learned. There were ‘a-ha!’ moments. People were making breakthroughs. Trust was being earned. There were various exercises where you were encouraged to build deep connections with those around you. Almost all were strangers who you didn’t know 48 hours ago. It was a valuable reminder that we’re more similar than we are different. It also reminded us that connecting with one another is a rather natural experience when we don’t let our personal baggage get in the way. A sense of community was being built. A few rituals were introduced. Things like a big ‘good morning!’ response, jumping up and down yelling ‘I’m excited’, or the awkward soul-train dance party.”

“The past, no matter how it actually transpired, is a truthy story that we tell ourselves, Karen argued, and it justifies our future actions. But the future needs to inform the present, not the past. She asked us to think of the future as empty, a blank slate, nothingness. This was close to impossible for me, like thinking of the boundlessness of the universe. I couldn’t help but immediately put bits of the past into the nothingness. Otherwise it would be too lonely. Lonely was scary. The future was like floating through outer space, and the past was gravity. The past, as varied, disappointing and predictive of future behavior as it was, felt safe. But as we all knew — we just apparently needed Karen to remind us — safe was bad. Safe was for immortals. Apparently we are not immortal.”