Learning how to bartend

“So what did I do? I played it safe and kept to the basics. I sliced limes. I sliced lemons. I sliced lemons again. I sliced oranges. I opened beer bottles. I poured wine. I washed glasses. I chatted with guests. And then the mother of the bride came along. She wanted to ask the bartender a question about their contract, and since he was distracted, I decided to make a drink for the next person in line. She asked for Red Berry Ciroc with Sprite, made with literally a shot of Red Berry Ciroc and Sprite. Can’t mess that up. And I didn’t. The moment of triumph was short-lived, however, when my fellow bartender came up to me and said, “just stick with the beer and the cash register. I’ll do the mixed drinks.” It hurt. But you know what? Because I had all this extra time to chat up the customers, even though I technically served less drinks, I made more tips. So in the end, this is a success story.”

“As the wedding, guests flooded the bar area just after the final vows and I froze. It’s a wedding—I was under the impression most guests would opt for wine or beer at the reception dinner—but no, I was dead wrong. I mean, what is an AMF? (For future reference, it’s actually an “Adios Mother F*****” which is basically a Long Island Ice Tea minus the Coke plus Blue Curacao and Sweet and Sour). Who wants to spend $10 on bottom-shelf liquor and blue food dye at a wedding? The kind of guest I was unprepared to bartend—the one who has already taken three shots of Hennessy.”

“My first night bartending ever was a sold out Deadmau5 concert at a brand new concert venue. Service bar without stools to encourage you to go back inside and watch the show. I had a line for 7 straight hours. Very much a “sink or swim” experience. I was clueless and responding to drink orders like a vodka soda with “and what kind of soda with that?”